Filed under: Authorities | Tags: beached, council, fin whale, IOW, Island, Isle of Wight, IW, piss up in brewery, Pringvale, Ryde, whale
hilst searching through the many photos on my hard drive the other day, trying to locate a particular image which I vaguely remembered but had absolutely no clue as to what title I had given it and even less idea of where it was in the maze of folders within folders, I came across these rather sad images taken of the dead whale on Springvale beach a few years ago. I believe it was washed up on Bembridge ledge and towed from there onto the beach as it was a hazard to shipping. 
I cant say for sure but as far as I recall it was a fin whale. The one overriding memory people will have was the stench. It was on the beach at the end of the Puckpool sea wall by the Battery pub but you could smell it as you walked past Harcourt Sands approaching the Dell cafe, at the other end of the sea wall. The smell was disgusting when it arrived but after it had been allowed to fester untouched for a good few days, before the council finally did something, it was revolting. This involved the usual sloppy cowboy approach
which we have come to expect from the council in that the poor thing was literally pulled apart by some geezer using a JCB! and dumped it on a truck. After which the “specialists” made virtually no effort to clear up the remainder and the tide carried great lumps of stringy 
whale meat and blubber which spread along the beach as far as Ryde harbour. It was half buried in the sand for months afterwards with people frantically trying to stop their dogs eating it. An appalling health hazard from start to the eventual finish which so easily could have been avoided had the job of been done properly, professionally and promptly.
Filed under: Wight Ways | Tags: beach, grockle, IOW, islander, Isle of Wight, IW, ovener, red squirrel, Ryde, surfer, surfing
round about this time of the year you will start to notice large amounts of small flat white objects washed up on
the islands beaches. The islanders will assure you that they are nothing more than cuttlefish bones and they will even go to the lengths of placing the odd dead cuttlefish on the beaches in order to persuade us, and avoid any further awkward questions. However my spies have discovered the truth behind this 
mystery which the islanders would much rather us overners and grockles knew nothing about, that they are in actual fact discarded squirrels surfboards.
Contrary to that which we have been led to believe there are in fact plenty of red squirrels living on the mainland and around about this time of the year they tend to get an irresistible urge to head
over en masse to the island in order to while away the summer months in such pleasant and tranquil surroundings. This being an exclusive red squirrel stronghold they can be free of their grey cousins throughout the summer as it so happens that the grey squirrels are lousy surfers and the reds are quite excellent in that department. Therefore on arrival having successfully negotiated 
the Solent, and feeling a bit cream crackered, the squrfers abandon their squrfboards on the beaches and wearily head off to establish their summer quarters and reacquaint themselves with their many old friends and 
acquaintances who choose to live on the island all the year round. The resident island squirrels aren’t quite so pleased with the arrangement however and group together whilst rather begrudgingly referring to the recently arrived multitude of mainland squrfers as the overners.
Filed under: Historic Wight | Tags: Communism, corruption, council, IOW. IW, Isle of Wight, Karl Marx, Ryde
arl Marx has always been somewhat of a hero of mine in fact he is almost my favourite Marx, coming in a very close second to Groucho. 
So when I caught wind that the father of communism used to stay at 11 Nelson Street in Ryde I immediately despatched one of my spies to investigate. Karl and his wife Jenny stayed at Nelson Street for some weeks in 1874 whilst Karl was recovering from a bout of illness. His doctor had forbidden him to work, Marx did however study the numerous island newspapers of the time and it is recorded he commented on the local electioneering. 
Quite what impact the way the island was run had on Karl’s ideology we can only speculate but Marx was concerned about corruption within 
the socialist movement itself as the very progress of the movement was threatened by the corruption of its leaders the source of the corruption was bourgeois society and its wealth. It seams that our Karl also had a jovial side as he and Jenny would have bouts of uncontrollable laughter to the extent that they dare not even glance at each other for fear of going into one.
Quite why the council haven’t acknowledged the presence of the great man on the island, with a plaque to commemorate him, I feel raises further suspicion that Karl’s views of the islands leadership were far from favourable. Could they still be in fear of revolution? 
So I have designed a plaque, and shown how nicely it would adorn number eleven if the council would only get their collective finger out, as a celebration of the father of communism who together with Friedrich Engels produced the Communist manifesto.
